Some journaling from the pandemic times

Keren Apura
2 min readAug 9, 2021

I’m right where I’m supposed to be.

That’s the peace, the reassurance I need right now. The Lord has been breaking, breaking this need for constant productivity in me, the striving, the greedy eyes looking at what others are doing or accomplishing or experiencing and comparing my own life to it.

He’s inviting me back into the peace of His Presence and the reassurance that the things that are meant to be mine, He will bring to me.

I don’t have to fall into the mentality of, “If I don’t work hard enough, I won’t get all the good things I want in life, because I won’t deserve them.”

And He always leads me back to Matthew 6: “Consider the lilies of the field…” A verse I’ve heard so many times, but still struggle to live by. Can I be counterculture and rely on His goodness to meet my every need?

He has given me such a wealth of TIME and the ability to be generous to others with it. This is what He wants for me right now, and I revel in it. It’s such a space of peace and rest, and I am so grateful for it. I feel so favored to have this time instead of stresses about worries and work.

Help me to lean into Your peace, Lord.

Sing to the Lord, for He has done wonderful things. Make known His praise around the world. Let all the people of Jerusalem shout His praise with joy! For great is the Holy One of Israel who lives among you.

Isaiah 12:5–6 [NLT]



Keren Apura

Full-time vagabond. Writing about things I don’t want to forget.